Chapter VIII. How to overcome difficult situations without creating new problems If you were invited to visit You used to go to visit with your parents all the time and you didn’t have to worry about all the difficulties that so often arise when going to visit - all for

42 Raising new questions, achieving new opportunities, considering old problems from new points of view - this is what distinguishes the real advancement of science. Finding new ways to solve problems is what allows you to overcome any situation with honor. Exists

To create is power. Money is not a goal or even a way to get rich. They are just a means of exchange, reflecting the value of certain services. Money appears where there is activity in the results of which other people are interested. And where there is no benefit,

How did you come to study the difficulties we create for each other?

I started by studying children's thinking, even making puzzle toys myself. I experimented for about fifteen years, and then I realized that I was interested in the social aspect of all this. When a child is offered a puzzle toy, this situation is usually analyzed as an encounter between the child and the object, during which he solves an intellectual problem. But for the child, the basis of this situation is interaction with the adult who brought this toy. The child is trying to understand what the adult wants from him and how he should behave.

This, of course, very much depends on the child. I once gave a puzzle toy to a three-year-old child. He understood it very well, showed me everything perfectly, and when I continued questioning, at some point he told me: “Well, I’ve already explained everything to you!” It meant: “Let you continue to write, and I will play with the puzzle.” There are such very inquisitive children who are really interested in the device, and not in why the adult brought it. But usually children view this situation as an interaction with an adult, as a reason to talk.

And at the same time, I realized one more thing, it just dawned on me at some point: it is important to find out not only how we help the child in his research, but also how we hinder him, how we counteract the child’s exploratory behavior.

Are we in the way? What for?

An adult may have a negative attitude towards exploratory behavior in general. He feels that exploratory behavior is always dangerous. This is justified - after all, when you examine a new object, it can present an unpleasant surprise. Even at the physiological level, it has been shown that the reaction to novelty is always associated with a defensive reaction, that is, when you explore something new, you must be ready to jump back immediately if something happens. And many adults intuitively believe that you don’t need to explore anything - you’ll be healthier.

There may also be negative attitudes towards research behavior in certain areas. Let's say something is considered indecent. For example, you cannot eavesdrop or spy. Or social stereotypes intervene: “Don’t do this, it’s not for boys.”

Finally, there are very specific situational prohibitions related to safety considerations: “Do not approach the iron while it is hot.” What emerges is a hierarchy of prohibitions on research behavior, associated both with general attitudes and with some completely situational things.

There are grounds for such fears. Will the child learn what he needs to learn by exploring the world on his own? He can learn bad and harmful things.

This is a very important question. Exploratory behavior and creative thinking are free activities. To what extent can we guarantee the result of someone else's creative activity? The answer is: the more creative it is, the less control we have over its outcome. The formation of creative thinking and, especially, a creative personality with predetermined properties is impossible. One person can teach another to be creative if they are both talented, but the interaction between two talented people will always be largely unpredictable.

And yes, you are absolutely right, all this can end badly. If he learns the wrong thing, he will go astray and die while conducting a risky experiment. It is from these fears that opposition to creative activity arises.

So, maybe we shouldn’t encourage her too much?

Parents are not forever, and the day will come when there will be no one to cover your child. He will have to act alone, creatively - in new uncertain conditions.

So you definitely need to encourage it. Here, of course, a lot depends on the parents’ value ideas about what kind of future awaits us and what we will need. And what can I do as a teacher to make the child feel good there? In this case, the parent will in any case face some unpleasant consequences of his choice.

What are the difficulties?

Why do adults usually create difficulties for each other?

I identify four types of difficulties. The first type is destructive difficulties. They are created for someone else to make him feel bad. Because of rivalry, for example, or jealousy. This is a very ancient story; even bacteria can make life difficult for competitors.

The other type - diagnostic difficulties - is more advanced from an evolutionary point of view. These are, for example, test attacks: to understand whether I can attack further or whether this is a dangerous creature that will devour me. This is a subtype of diagnostic difficulties aimed at causing subsequent damage. Another type of them is difficulties created for the sake of the research itself. When I'm just curious who's in front of me. This, of course, includes all sorts of psychological experiments. Or at the everyday level: teenagers like to provoke others out of interest in how they will react. There is a third subtype of diagnostic difficulties - these are difficulties aimed at subsequent help. For example, stress tests in medicine. A person potentially suffering from diabetes is given a large amount of sugar solution to drink on an empty stomach. This may make him feel worse, but by looking at the dynamics of his condition, doctors will know how best to help him. And they are common in teaching: for example, a teacher tests students in order to understand how best to further develop training based on their level of knowledge.

The third type of difficulties is constructive. For example, carnivorous animals bring live prey to their young so that they can exercise. Living, fluttering and defending prey - this is fraught with dangers and costs. But a parent goes to this length to train his child. Moreover, the animal can regulate the degree of difficulty of the task, for example, by pressing down the victim to one degree or another. A person lives in a world of constructive difficulties created by other people: kindergarten, school, university, and all public life are built on constructive difficulties. We learn throughout our lives, and mastering new skills is always fraught with difficulties.

Finally, the fourth type is gaming difficulties. All these quizzes or sports competitions range from completely harmless to deadly.

So, most often, overcoming difficulties in a game is a learning situation that simulates real life.

Yes, the boundaries between these types of difficulties are blurred, any classifications interfere with understanding the nuances. If we take the games of the ancient Indians, in which the last half was played with the head of the captain of the losing team, is it a game or not a game? Yes, and professional sport is to some extent a game, and to some extent a profession.

Perhaps difficulties are a very subjective thing? If you perceive the situation as a game, then difficulties can be recognized as something pleasant and interesting.

Certainly! In general, research shows that children explore objects with greater interest if the objects have a moderate level of difficulty for them. It is not interesting to do things that are too simple or too complex.

Do different societies somehow differ in the types of difficulties?

It seems to me that the ratio of constructive, destructive and diagnostic difficulties in a given society is an important characteristic of that society. A society with few destructive difficulties will be more peaceful.

A measure for assessing difficulties has not yet been invented. I would introduce an indicator of the constructiveness or destructiveness of a difficulty, based on this: if a person, or an organization, or even a state, after encountering a difficulty, can pose and solve more difficult problems, then this difficulty was constructive. And vice versa.

About those who do not look for easy ways

There are also people who, seemingly unconsciously, but constantly create difficulties and severe trials for themselves in life.

Psychologist Vadim Petrovsky has a series of works devoted to what he calls “risk for the sake of risk” and “sublimation of the level of difficulty.” He experimentally showed that there are people who steadily strive for the boundary of a given situation. They approach it to test their capabilities and the capabilities of the border. A classic example is extreme athletes who create the most dangerous situations for themselves. This is also exploratory behavior. In children, by the way, the motivation to explore boundaries is also highly developed. They test themselves: can I hang by my hands, say, at a dangerous height, or eat something inedible. And this often ends badly.

These are not exactly the kind of people I had in mind: those who walk on the edge and those who create problems for themselves are usually completely different people. Although, perhaps, they have something in common - people strive to overcome difficulties in order to feel alive. As Proust wrote, “life is an effort in time” - and if there is no effort, then there is no feeling of life.

Yes, you overcome difficulties to feel the reality of your existence. You feel it especially after the test. It can also be very different here. One person told me how he and his friends suddenly stopped skydiving after one of them crashed. I think they treated it like a game. But real death changed everything. But it also happens differently when this feeling of the authenticity of life in extreme conditions becomes a super value. Often, for example, pilots do not want to leave their flying profession and try to feign health when they can no longer fly. Because for them, flying is a completely different quality of being.

Why do you need a melancholic person?

What do we know about the strategies people use to cope with difficulties?

There is a lot of research about this. There are three classic strategies. First, strategies aimed at solving the problem. Secondly, strategies aimed at emotional coping, that is, when a person tries to calm himself down. The third type is strategies that change attitudes towards a problem. There is an anecdote: a man suffering from enuresis meets with his old acquaintance. He advises him to go to a psychotherapist. After some time they meet again. “Well, did psychotherapy help?” - "Oh yeah!" - “Has your enuresis gone?” - “No, but now I’m happy - now I’m proud of him!”

This seems to be exactly what psychotherapists usually do...

Some yes, but only some. However, we cannot say which strategy for coping with difficulties is the best. Different strategies are appropriate for different situations. So, if there is objectively no way to solve the problem, and a person stubbornly follows the first strategy, he burns out emotionally and may become depressed.

When Iraq started firing rockets at Israel in the early 90s and the Israelis were hiding in bomb shelters, they conducted an interesting study. It turned out that this situation is better tolerated by people whose coping style is emotional. They work more with their emotions and, as a result, suffer less while sitting in a bomb shelter for hours.

And from an evolutionary point of view, it is beneficial when in a population there are different types of people’s reactions to difficult situations...

Yes. It would seem, why do you need a melancholic person - a whiner and so on. But it turns out that the group needs a person who is sensitive to possible dangers. Even though these are often false alarms, in the event of a real threat he will not sleep.

What kind of future are we preparing children for?

Aren’t you afraid of a future without difficulties - when robots will work for people, and computers will think? In such a future, research activity is not really needed.

But I don’t believe in such a future. Everything is new for a child, and he will explore the world one way or another - this is how a person is biologically designed. Like a monkey, he will first explore all this. Now there is a funny video going around the Internet, a cat rides a robot vacuum cleaner and plays with it. And the child will use forms of exploratory behavior characteristic of a person in relation to such an object. I think there's only more incentive to smarten up.

As for smartphones, as computers learn to perform some human functions, humans will take on other tasks. Computers, like vacuum cleaners, simply free up our resources, giving us a chance to do something more meaningful. I remember a saying about one book: “Smart people, after reading this book, became even smarter, and stupid people - even dumber.” It's the same with a computer.

When will artificial intelligence overtake human intelligence?

I don’t believe this - human intelligence will always be needed. I think that our intelligence will be hybrid or, as they now say, augmented. Our mind will become more powerful due to interaction with different computer systems.

So, should we not worry about artificially creating constructive difficulties for children - they will find them themselves?

Difficulties are necessary, and we all create difficulties for children, including developmental ones. For example, when we play chess with them and do not give in or give in moderately, adjusting the degree of difficulty. Here, of course, the issue of balance is important - for example, losing greatly demotivates children, but the child must still face the fact that he can lose. There is no easy solution, it is the art of balance. A person must have experience of failure. If someone thinks that he succeeds in everything, this is an inadequate attitude towards life.

This is similar to the story with stress - there is developmental stress and destructive stress.

Absolutely right. If a child is very passionate about the game itself, losing will not upset him too much; he is interested in the activity itself. And losing then is simply an indicator that you don’t know enough yet. And if the main thing for you is to win on a personal level, losing can really have destructive consequences. It is important not to lose the child’s trust.

There is a trick to teach swimming - throwing it into the water. Once upon a time, I read a novel in which the character had such an experience as a child, around five or six years old. His father threw him into the pool so he could swim out. And the mother looked at it. And this character lives his whole life with the feeling that his father may have done the right thing, but he cannot forgive his mother, who stood and watched. Such subtle nuances can greatly influence the result.

Perhaps there is some kind of personality trait that allows some people to easily tolerate such things, while others have difficulty?

There are people who are very sensitive to provocations; they perceive them as undermining trust in the world. I often give students an example from a story about a talented teenage fencer who had a psychological problem: in training he fenced very well, but in competitions he lost and behaved too constrained. He had a coach who also used various provocations. He believed that all means are good to achieve results.

So, the time has come for some important performance, the shackled guy is warming up, a coach comes up to him and shows him an expensive ballpoint pen; in those days they had just appeared and were very rare. “Look what they gave me for a while,” and walked away. The guy is about to leave, then the coach returns: “Where is the pen?” - “I think he left it there on the bench.” “There’s no pen,” the coach says. - They gave it to me for a while. You betrayed me". And the guy, in a state of complete prostration, goes out onto the platform and wins, because his psychological dominant has shifted. The coach correctly understood that he just needed to be distracted. When the guy comes down, he is met by a smiling coach and says: “I did this on purpose. Here’s the pen, everything’s fine.” And then the guy leaves this section.

So this is a failed strategy?

The important question here is about the planning horizon, about what goals the person creating the difficulties sets. The coach took into account only a short horizon, setting the goal to win the competition. But from the point of view of the distant planning horizon, he did not achieve his goals - he lost a talented athlete.

This athlete turned out to be sensitive to deception, but at the same time he would cope well with honestly created, albeit extreme, difficulties. If we talk about personality types, there are people who are more sensitive to physical difficulties, and others - to interpersonal ones. There are people with fighting qualities who cope more easily with difficulties created by others, simply because they are mobilized by fighting motivation. And if there is no enemy, they cannot mobilize. And there are people who give up if they know that someone is doing something specifically against them - this awareness alone completely unsettles them.

It turns out that there is sensitivity to physical tests - and there is ethical sensitivity. What is their optimal level?

I think that the optimum here is determined by our basic ideas about the future, about the hostility or benevolence of this world. If we believe that everything will be bad, everyone will be at each other’s throats, then we must, like it or not, cultivate fighting qualities in a person. And if we believe that everything in the world will be fine, on the contrary, ethical sensitivity.

I also want to remind you of one story - a fantastic one, “All the Tenali Borogovs.” Children accidentally find a package sent from the future. There, the scientist conducted an experiment with a time machine, put his children's toys in a box and sent them into the past. And children found these puzzle toys, specially designed to adapt the brain to the perception of an unknown dimension of space. Thanks to these toys, their minds change, and they eventually leave our world, from adults who no longer understand them, into another dimension. In reality, we also have to prepare children for a completely different life - in the future, but we ourselves do not understand what this life will be like and often prepare them, on the contrary, for life in the past.

It is precisely because children must prepare for a future that we do not really imagine that we must in every possible way contribute to the development of the child’s own research activity. We need to motivate him to research and create comfortable safe spaces for this. Although if a person is creative, then her research will certainly touch upon some dangerous or socially unacceptable areas. But the motivation to explore the world still needs to be developed. Here we can create “developmental difficulties”, gradually complicating the level of tasks, creating problematic situations.

It seems to me that it is also important that when we prepare children for some kind of future, even unconsciously, we thereby create this future.

Yes, sure. And if we prepare all children for life in a hostile, aggressive world, then most likely this is how the world will become.

Features of national difficulties

But, apparently, fortunately, we don’t always succeed in our plans. The Soviet school seemed to prepare children for life in the industrial future, tried to form collectivism and did not value individual creative achievements too highly. But as a result, innovators and creators of the post-industrial economy are constantly appearing in Russia, such as the creators of Yandex or VKontakte. Sometimes, however, they have to emigrate...

Here we can recall the research of Alexander Auzan, dean of the Faculty of Economics of Moscow State University. He writes about some features of Russian culture that have been accurately reproduced for decades, and perhaps even centuries. One of these features is high individual creativity combined with very low negotiability and high conflict. As a result, we have unique solutions and inventions, but they do not reach the level of mass production. Because for this we need to unite, agree, and maintain standards. Auzan quotes the words of one Western businessman: “If you need to do a unique, complex thing, turn to the Russians. But if you need to do ten identical things, never turn to the Russians.”

It’s amazing, I see my exact portrait. But how do these traits develop in childhood?

This is a terribly interesting question, why Russian culture so consistently reproduces these personality traits. They tried to create the same collectivism using purely formal methods - it was not based on real common interests, on joint activity that was important in the understanding of all participants.

About ten years ago, a psychological and economic experiment was conducted, around which controversy still does not subside. There are three subjects, each of whom is given play money - twenty plastic tokens. Tokens earned in the game can then be exchanged for real money. Tokens can be invested in common projects that generate profit; it is divided equally among all those who invested the tokens. The problem of freeloaders arises - they understand that when others invest, they only need to invest one token - the profit is still divided equally. In order to study the attitude of others to this phenomenon, each participant is given the right to fine the other. You can pay one token to take three tokens from someone else. In this case, the entire group loses part of the profit - these four tokens leave the game, but you have the opportunity to express your attitude towards the freeloader. The result of this experiment in Russia was quite unexpected: Europeans often fine freeloaders, while our people, on the contrary, often fine those who have invested more than them.

One explanation is that the Europeans are strategizing to try to maximize the amount they will ultimately receive. And Russians are more focused on overtaking others. Then the optimal strategy is to invest little yourself, leaving a lot left, and fine the one who invested a lot as much as possible. He already invested so much, and then you also fined him. It turns out like in a joke: God said to a man: “Ask what you want, but keep in mind that for your neighbor I will do the same twice.” And the man says: “God, deprive me of one eye.”

But why?

It's difficult to answer. There is such an important indicator for culture, highlighted by Dodge and Quaye - attribution of hostile intent. How inclined are we to interpret troubles as someone else's machinations? In cultures where this is less the case, cooperative values ​​are developed. For them, trouble is not necessarily the machinations of villains, but the result of a mistake, coincidence or disservice. This is facilitated by the rejection of violence, relationships of trust and warmth in the family, the values ​​of cooperation and maintaining community. But I think that Russian culture is a culture in which the tradition of attributing hostile intent is very strongly represented. In such cultures, according to Dodge and Quaye, people have a completely different personal experience, including physical violence and a sense of failure in life, and they are instilled with values ​​such as personal honor, retribution, and the ability to stand up for oneself. As a result, no matter what happens, we think that it was done by bad people on purpose. In some cases, this has a basis, and a positive feedback loop arises: people become wary, and in response they also begin to act distrustfully, creating difficulties for others, and so the situation continues to escalate.

How easy it is to say, the world is bad, and I’m good for nothing... Just say it and that’s it! And do nothing about it... If you look at what is happening and the people around you, you will notice that we think about what is, what happens and bad things happen, but we don’t even think about what is exactly the same good things happen. Looking at a person in trouble, we think: oh! How terrible this world is. He's so dangerous and unpredictable. Sound familiar!? True, these thoughts slip through as habitually as unconsciously.

What happens to a person when everything is not going his way? He gets upset, he gets angry, he despairs and lets everything take its course. These are three natural stages. But the feeling is not the only thing that this generates; all this is reflected in what a person does in relation to the world around him. This breeds weakness or cruelty, but it also breeds selfishness. It would seem that if you were better and kinder to people, show your love, and make this world a better place! But this is impossible if you are in any of these stages. But we influence, influence everything around us every day. Sometimes we can lose the forest for the trees. And this will happen if we focus purely on selfishness.

What is ill health? This is when something interferes, something draws forces onto itself and the natural state is distorted. The same applies to other things that imply happiness and well-being. A person lives in several interconnected planes. And we have the ability to diagnose our plans:

• - emotional
• - mental
• - energy
• - physical

And we can not only diagnose what is happening, but also influence it. First of all, I wanted to express precisely this very essence, this very meaning within the framework of which we develop our activity.

Working with different plans implies that initially we have everything, it’s just that at some level something is preventing it from happening naturally, and this in turn makes us unhappy. This amazing discovery that I made for myself allows me to see life much more accurately. A simple example: if you take on some business with a gloomy mood, a negative attitude, then it is unlikely to be successful for you, or you are unlikely to be able to appreciate your victorious moment. Life itself and the many situations in it are diverse and ambiguous in their existing potential. To put it simply, it is not immediately possible to determine what is more in a given situation: evil or good. And we live like this every day, communicating with the world through our actions. However, life itself and the possibility of happiness occurs only in the present... That is, there is what is happening, different and changing, and we are among this, which means the possibility of the state of our well-being or ill-being at one time or another.

Think about this idea. There is a situation, and there are our ideas about it (views, habits, scales, angles of view, approaches to the situation and ways to interact with it). That’s why people are sick or sad, because nothing else came to their mind. Life is a constant action. A person is looking for himself... looking... for himself.. or his own... But he already exists, potentially he is already good... and something is just stopping him...

Philosophical question: what comes first, matter or consciousness?! Consciousness is primary, and then, in accordance with this, external factors interact and various relationships are built. And at the same time, we build our psyche, we create it in ourselves and what happens every day.

What fate is is certain events and circumstances that we will meet along the way. But where is the man himself in this? How about free will!? It is precisely this feature that allows us to change and change a lot through ourselves. Let's say someone makes a prediction and reads information, but does it in relation to who you are now, reflects a certain ratio of factors and gives you the resulting result. Therefore... if we change, the result under the same circumstances may be completely different. Pay attention to your automatisms and addictions, bad habits and inclinations. Here is a short cheat sheet for those who are interested in such things.

Of course, it is much easier to fight a hypothetical enemy than to understand your shortcomings. Moreover, it’s even better to find an opponent who is not so easy to defeat. Sometimes it is very difficult for a person to admit his participation, that he himself is largely to blame for his troubles. It is much more convenient for him to believe that other people are to blame for his misfortunes. It’s easier to blame everything on the enemy, to think that it is some enemy who is plotting against him out of envy or self-interest.

If we want the best, if we want to become cleaner, stronger, luckier, healthier in our lives and before God, we should be very careful about what we teach ourselves to do every day. And to comprehend and work through all this. Nothing passes without a trace and nothing happens for nothing. And the most important thing is that we can do it ourselves, and the result is worth it. It’s just that such things happen naturally for some, for others, comprehension and disappointment in negative things comes through suffering and “feeling what they call the hard way,” and you can also do it like I described.

We can be aware of our desires and needs and realize them more consciously, improving this process. Experience, skills, habits appear. The constant absorption of low-quality information that is of little use in life, the lack of self-awareness, the lack of even the simplest skills to process it into something necessary and useful (the ability to manage the situation, the various resources that we have, to our benefit) makes a person inadequate and passive, which means unhappy.

Oh well, if sin were a purely abstract concept and there was no further reasoning. Among the many forms of existence, there are those that, by virtue of their nature, always strive to lead a person astray in order to feed. We are not alone in this world. The first task of evil spirits is to impose on you certain inclinations and predilections, ideas about yourself as a dirty and immoral being. From a psychological point of view, this is to distort the image of self-perception.

Of course, you will somehow justify all this, find reasons, say, well, this is just me! However, the very essence and how it arises and is formed will pass by. That's the deception! This happens very subtly and almost imperceptibly.

Then, there is the task of “making your karma heavier”, and after that,... here you are, dear and beloved - our person! Product ready!
You become accessible to everything bad from those who have at least some power and methods of influence in the subtle world. In a word, thus, an unfree and well-controlled person arises. At the same time, each time, without realizing exactly what and how it happened, a person will find excuses in himself... Surprisingly, it may be offensive, but this is so.

Yes Yes! This is exactly how it happens, first you need to be made accessible, and then influence. That is, I want to say that having some purity, a person himself, without even realizing it, is under the strong protection of God, regardless of how much of a believer or an atheist he is. But when he loses this protection, usually various energy problems rain down on him as if from a cornucopia. There is an intention, and there are more favorable, more complete and less favorable ways of achieving what you want. Our task is to define certain intentions, and then, intentionally, in other words, purposefully and consciously implement them.

“When something happens, there are some reasons why it happened, what contributed to it. But our manifestation of weakness is that we usually do not understand it, so much of the unfolding action happens unconsciously.” When we don’t know about something and the fact that it is not conscious, it can have an impact on its own. We cannot do anything about it due to its unconsciousness. But when we find out the source and its nature, we become able to choose appropriate solutions or ways to influence the cause or effect, we can take note of them, transform, remove or mitigate them.

We have our desires and needs in the present and there are different ways to realize them. Before you come up with something and then implement it, FEEL IT FROM THE VERY BEGINNING TO THE END, UNTIL ITS COMPLETE IMPLEMENTATION. Feel the upcoming result as fully and deeply as possible within yourself even before you do it and you will be surprised how much you can understand about it in advance. IT'S LIKE CHOOSING WHAT YOU WOULD EAT. YOU WANT SOMETHING, BUT WHAT EXACTLY IS NOT YET CLEAR, BUT IF YOU EAT ANYTHING, THE RESULT WILL BE SOME DISAPPOINTMENT AND DISCOMFORT. WE CAN CREATE, SEE AND FEEL SEVERAL DIFFERENT ALTERNATIVES IN OUR IMAGINATION AND CHOOSE THE ONE OR WITH THOSE FEATURES THAT SUIT US MOST.

How to remove unwanted things? This is to understand what you want and what you don’t want and, with this useful information, think about how to deal with it. Comprehend what is happening now and work out why you don’t like any action or situation? What exactly do you not like about it? Think about the reasons: what could this be connected with (in us, in other people, in what is happening)? What and how can you change? Look wider, more fully... We always have alternatives. We can vary some elements, change them... We can change the directions of activity and attention, but if we simply feel them, but are not aware of them, nothing can be done about it.

How to distinguish what is needed from what is not needed? How to distinguish what we need to do in relation to this or that information coming from outside? How to distinguish one information from another? By what awakens, what responds and what is triggered in your living system. What do you begin to strive for after this (movement towards destruction, movement towards nowhere, movement towards the better). The necessary information awakens a person, leads him to the opportunity and desire to change, to take steps towards upward experience. All of these things perform very powerful cleaning. Knowledge opens up a new level. A person in this world is not just an observer, he is an active creator, he creates himself... We can rise above our imperfections and turn them into a series of vital perfections. But this does not mean that you need to force yourself for days, but it means that you need to carry out work when it is necessary, where it is necessary. We need to learn to feel it, and we have this sign: what awakens, what responds and what is triggered in your living system.? This is an active tool for our creation - the development of creativity (Level of the Creator). In this way we develop our Divine nature.

When we do something, we can think about what we like and what we don't like, but it is better to "think about what is already good about it and understand what could be improved." This kind of thinking leads somewhere. The unfamiliar may not seem pleasant, but in reality, this does not mean that it is not pleasant to create, it means that we imagined everything like that. “Presented” is both action (comprehension and implementation) and influence and result. It’s one thing when you sit, dream about something, think, without linking your thoughts with the real world, some thoughts may be pleasant to you, but due to their incompleteness and isolation, such things usually lead to disappointment.
It can be seen as if we are preparing a delicious dish, but the ingredients are elements of reality. It is only important to make them aware.

When something unpleasant happens, the first thing we experience in ourselves is resistance and may be indignation, indignation. But if the situation remains unresolved, it remains, as it were, suspended. And if we don’t accept the situation as it is and therefore don’t try to figure it out, we either suppress ourselves or try to self-soothe. In any case, there is a struggle and we cannot improve anything. Worry never turns into anything more. We are glitchy and resist, keeping it all inside ourselves, somewhere in the margins of our attention, and at the same time contributing to exactly this in what is happening. After all, we never began to resolve it, so we left it unresolved. Our reality has an undesirable result, the result of our actions.

Something about problems. Life through various signs and situations gives us useful information that would be useful to understand, but to understand correctly - so that it is for your benefit. What could be considered truly valuable? The easiest way is to decide that this is material security and health like a bull. Strange as it may seem, this often does not bring any benefit; on the contrary, it complicates and confuses everything. People often confuse cause and effect, so they turn their attention to the wrong place. Popular wisdom says: “Give a fool a billion, he’ll spend it on whatever he wants.” As you can understand, it is not a billion or even good health that improves our life, all this is a consequence of completely different things, but if we think about a billion and remarkable health, we will get nothing but sadness and disappointment where we live. And we live in Russia.

And if you figure out what you need in life, and on the other hand, figure out how much will be required of you so that you finally achieve the coveted figure, will you really need this billion?! We are not aware of such decisions, but the belief that it is the billion that is at the forefront will play a cruel joke on a person. Where did this come from? Why billion? Here is another source of suffering. When talking about happiness, people are accustomed to turning their gaze outside and complaining about all sorts of material limitations, while life itself happens in them and around them day after day. I'm not even talking about the fact that when you achieve some benefits, you often forget about it very quickly, and sometimes you even feel sincere disappointment. How many people have ruined their destiny in pursuit of purely external attributes.

In life itself, happiness is brought by: the things we do, the communication we build day after day, our ability to understand ourselves and what is happening. It is in this fleetingness that what is born or not born is what makes our life itself fuller or more deprived. We live here and now, and life is an ever-changing present. One thing you can notice about yourself is that people often do not have an elementary point of support. To be a person is to be a person, to be.. Not to always prove something to anyone, but to simply be and feel like who you want to feel like. Be and make yourself a person internally worthy of yourself... and live with it. As for affairs and undertakings, nothing prevents you from figuring out what will be best for you.. Those who are always proving something to someone will never find themselves, happiness and the fullness of their lives. Fashion, concepts, rules without a deep understanding of the essence of these things... these are just “marked limits of the fence” along which “organized herds are driven away”... Someone Lives, and someone eternally imitates... I hope that you will understand correctly the comparison with herds. You can be a person, or you can be part of a crowd. These are fundamentally different states.

Everything that happens first happens in our minds... If first you see it in your head, you will start working with it.. If you find nothing there, only empty and fussy thoughts, it is unlikely that your actions will be successful. If a person cannot rely on himself, find a foothold, then how can he rely on others? How can they help him like that? What? There are things that a person himself needs to do, and only then seek some kind of support and understanding. If you yourself don’t know what you need, then how can you explain it all? How can they help you?

We all manage the PRESENT very differently... “The end of everything!”, “I’m a loser” - this is what a person thinks about himself, and then, against the background of this, he does in what is happening... For something to happen, before All you need to do is believe in it, both for the good and vice versa. How do we look at things, in relation to what? What is this period, scale, needs? Are we looking for obstacles or opportunities? Do you consider yourself a failure because you didn't become a billionaire, or because you think in a way that only leads to disappointment?

We have such powers and capabilities that we don’t even suspect about and all this, in many ways, comes down to the level of such boring and banal things. It is amazing! The kind of framework a person puts himself into when he thinks all sorts of nonsense. The simple fact is that most people are unhappy in their lives, and they think they are unhappy because their external conditions do not meet their expectations of life. Therefore, they are convinced that they cannot be happy until the external situation changes. They think that if only certain conditions changed, then they would... Yes Yes! You can complain about your miserable fate, about how many different types of misfortunes there are in it, and so, in this way of thinking and acting, your whole life can pass. But you can change for the better...

“Everyone is bad” or something like that.. This is simply full of a person’s thoughts. In any case, it is our weaknesses that make our opponents strong... I already wrote about this once, that for one it’s a problem, for another it’s seeds... So the point is not to look for “shoals”, but to decide how to live with it so that everything is as good as possible... The only thing we can start from in order to improve something is the present. This is the only real basis on which something can be improved.

But as I already said, when something unpleasant happens, the first thing we experience in ourselves is resistance. Life through various signs and situations gives us useful information that would be useful to understand, but to understand correctly - so that it is for your benefit. And if we don’t accept the situation as it is and therefore don’t try to figure it out, we either suppress ourselves or try to self-soothe. In any case, there is a struggle and self-deception, and so we cannot improve anything. At work there may be a bad boss, grumpy relatives, selfish friends who are traitors, a loved one who is in a hurry to get rid of you at your first weakness, etc. A lot of things... He who does nothing makes no mistakes, but along with mistakes there is a chance to achieve much more. However, life goes on and we live in the present, which means our state in it is decisive.

We always face the need, as well as the opportunity for our own development. And we always have a choice: to develop or leave everything as it is. The main thing is not to stop... There is a passive role of the victim. Victims of people and all kinds of circumstances. The position in which a person puts himself in what is happening, with his mood, understanding, actions... And there are other internal positions that we are able to implement. So, what interferes with the fullness and joy of existence? Various obstacles, which are primarily located within ourselves. What makes a person’s thought useful, complete and fulfilling, and what is the opposite? What turns into full-fledged action, and what leads into illusions and often prevents us from living?

Possible options:

• Self-rejection
• Rejection of reality
• Refusal of the desire and ability to perceive everything as it is
• Passivity and a passive position in what is happening.
• Obsessing over one aspect or side of a matter/situation
• Tendency to generalize (both from the point of view of time: past, present, future - always or forever, and the features and patterns of the situation - this is always the case, this is the only way it happens, everything is conditional and relative). Incl. globalization, exaggeration.
• Tendency to automatism (habits instead of comprehension and comprehension)
• Tendency to imitate instead of understand.
• Ego instead of personality (false and superficial values ​​and aspirations in what is happening)
• Lack of understanding that there may be a difference between “what I think and what is.”
• Lack of understanding that there are facts, and then there is interpretation... and in general, many possible interpretations.
• Lack of positive experience.
• Fears, complexes.
• Feelings of guilt, instead of understanding the reasons and looking for an opportunity to somehow understand and resolve the current situation or at least its consequences. (those who achieve this for the purpose of manipulation insist on guilt)
• Not distinguishing what is my responsibility and what is other people's responsibility.
• Completeness and incompleteness of thought (whether you managed to bring your comprehension to a useful state or not)
• Lack of clarity of goals and their components (there is always something that would be better or worse for you)
• Inability to identify and highlight the main and secondary things in a situation
• Poor physical, emotional and energetic state.
• Lack of understanding, vision and feeling of the difference between what is yours and what is someone else’s in terms of energy and mood.
• Lack of connection with a higher Power (protection and patronage, intuition)
• The realization that we have the Spark of God in us, that true happiness is not selfishness.